Since You Asked… by Martha
Consultant, clinical hypnotherapist, teacher and author
Answer: The biggest mistake people make when looking for love is that they are not clear on what they are looking for. If you just say “I want a lover” then you will get a lover but it may or may not be who you really want or deserve. Therefore, the first step to getting ready for love is to put together your list of requirements for the love you are looking for. This means write out at least 25 characteristics that you expect your love to have. This is a great start to being more clear on who you want to attract.
A healthy relationship is one where you respect each other, care for each other, and love each other as you are. When you learn to accept yourself and love yourself just as you are – not thinner or richer or more this or that, but really like yourself… then you will attract a person who likes you just as you are too.
Absolutely Yes! If you are focusing on your faults you will attract a relationship that will keep pointing out your faults. If you are focused on all your awesomeness you will attract someone who will appreciate your awesomeness. If you worry about finding someone mean or abusive, guess what… you attract someone mean and abusive. Your mind is directed by what you focus on and is always on the alert to match what you focus on and cause you to notice it, once you notice it you feel that it is comfortable because a part of you recognizes it, and once you feel comfortable you welcome it into your life; even if it is not what you want. It is important to focus on what you do want so that you attract that into your life.
The mindset is that of “I am so happy and I want to share this happiness with someone as awesome as me”
Your are probably focused on just finding someone, but have not taken the time to decide what your requirements are. Without having an idea of the type of person you want, you end up attracting just anybody. Then upon closer examination they end up not meeting your needs. Your behavior, language, choice of words change and the person reads you loud and clear that they are not who you want. Get clear about who you want and they will keep calling date after date.
Martha Soria Sears is a coach, consultant, clinical hypnotherapist, teacher and author. The world of human potential and transformation has been her focus for the past three decades.
Prior to answering her calling as a therapeutic advisor, Martha achieved marked success in the corporate world as a trusted advisor to top executives at Fortune 500 companies, including IBM, HP, Prudential, Cisco and Symantec.
Her company, Next Step Transformation Consulting and Academy’s mission is making a positive difference in the world by helping people awaken to their greatness.
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*Disclaimer: Suggestions made here are not intended as instruction. We are not responsible for any actions taken in reference to this blog. Anything discussed in this blog is intended for entertainment purposes only.